Big Brother Showmance

Let’s look at this season’s Big Brother.  There has been a couple that seemed to click right away in the house and it has developed into, what is called in the reality world, a showmance.  Viewers have been all over the relationship between Jeff and Jordon.

Let’s look at these two for a second.  Jeff is a 31 year old coming from Illinois and Jordon is only 22 and from North Carolina.  Jeff has a career in advertising while Jordon is still figuring out what she wants to do, working as a waitress in the meantime.  These two come from two different worlds.  Jeff is a city boy and Jordon is a small town girl.  Jeff is from the north and Jordon is from the south.  In real life, how likely would it have been that these two would have ever met, let alone hooked up?  Not very.

True Love Or Reality TV Strategy?

So, why have they formed a showmance on Big Brother?  Is it the situation?  Do they really like each other?  Will it last?  If we have learned anything from past showmances then I will say the showmance is part of their strategy on some level.  They probably do like each other, but not as much as they think they do and it probably will end when the cameras stop rolling.

No matter how real showmances are, they do add spice to reality TV.  You have to admit that watching a blooming romance is rather fun.  It just is a good thing for reality shows and for producers.  So, don’t expect anyone to learn anytime soon from the past showmance failures, but that isn’t so bad is it?  How boring would shows like Big Brother be without a little romance.

Is it possible to find true love on TV?  Many doubt it, but it has been done.  Remember Trista and Ryan?  Yep, the original Bachelorette married her chosen man and now they have two beautiful children.  They are living proof that it can be done.  However, they are about the only couple to have been labeled a success.

Let’s look at some big time failures and contemplate why they didn’t work out.

Bachelor Bob

This lovable teddy bear made a choice in the end, but rumors were he had already found the love of his life and was playing the game to carry out his contract with the show.  These rumors seemed to be true since shortly after the end of his Bachelor season, Bob married soap star Rebecca Budig.

Rock of Love superstar, Bret Michaels

This rock and roll man said he was looking for love in each of the three (yes, that is three) seasons of his reality show, but he never found it.  Was he really looking for love or just for a way to revive his fading career?  If you look at the facts then it seems like this was more of a career move since around the time of each show he released a new CD or went on tour.

Tila Tequila

What can you say about this often confused and always wild reality star?  Was she in it for love or fame?  Nobody really knows why Tila is so famous, but her reality show had two seasons where she was trying to figure out if it would be a man or a woman to win her heart.  It seems she wasn’t destined to find her love on TV, though.  The winner of the first season claims she just stopped speaking to him and the winner of the second season didn’t even really want to be with a woman so she declined a relationship in the season finale.

Looking over these three realty lovers doesn’t give you much hope that anything you see on reality dating shows is real.  However, if you are a hopeless romantic then I guess you can keep believing.  There is always Trista and Ryan, right?

From Reality TV Star to Murderer

How did Jenkins even get on the show if he was this unstable?  The truth is that despite background checks and extensive interviews and other screening procedures, Jenkins passed through and was given a chance to compete with others to date the star of the show, Megan Hauserman.

This situation brings to light a very scary side of reality TV.  You just can never tell about people.  You can check out their background, talk to their loved ones and do extensive research into who they are, but you just never know if they are capable of snapping one day.

What’s The Reality Life?

This is true in life in general, but it is just plain scary in the world of Reality TV dating shows.  You don’t know these people on the show.  You put all your trust in producers and those running the show to pick people who are stable and generally just good people.  However, you just never know.  It is scary to think that if you sign up for one of these shows that you could be standing alongside someone who is mentally unbalanced.

Is reality TV exposing people to unnecessary danger?  Is this a part of reality that producers don’t want you to see?  How many other shows have had contestants who were not stable?  It really makes you start to view people in a different light.  Think about the next time you sit down to your favorite reality TV show.

Scrutinity Is Hard On The Relationship?

It could be the fact that almost every Hollywood relationship is scrutinized and publicized for us all to see.  That’s what everyone seems to think.  It would be annoying to have people constantly following you, talking about you and publishing your pictures all over the place. I just don’t buy this excuse, though.  To me, even if everyone is watching, if you are truly in love then nothing is going to break you up.

So what do I think is wrong with Hollywood relationships?  I hate to be the bad guy, but in all honesty I think it has a lot to do with ego and being superficial.

Think about it.  They could literally have anyone they want, but they stick in Hollywood.  They say it is because it is too hard to date non-celebs.  Please, people!  Who do you think you are kidding?  You stick in Hollywood with the pretty people because they are just like you.  They are rich and beautiful.

Celeb – Non-Celeb Dating Is Not As Popular

You don’t want to be seen around town with an average Joe or average Jane because people wouldn’t give a crap about you.  Yeah, they might snap a few pics, but we have all seen how this plays out.  The celeb/non-celeb relationships quickly fade from the spotlight.

Celebs want high profile relationships because it gets them talked about.  When they are talked about they are popular.  When they are popular they get movie roles.

Bottom line here – there is no happy ever after in Hollywood because everything in Hollywood is fake.  Relationships can’t last when it was never real to begin with.  You date someone just because of who they are and how they can further your career and you can expect for it to fall apart.

That’s my two cents on the deal.  You can agree or disagree.  I won’t back down, though.  Hollywood relationships are just what they seem to be.  A way for a celeb to keep all eyes on them and to keep their star shining.

You think You Know Someone…

It really makes you start to question everything.  Her image was sparkling clean.  She was a country sweetheart and she was innocent.  Then news broke of her affair with hunky Eddie Cibrian, who is also married and whom she met on the set of a TV movie.

There are a lot of ways to justify cheating or at least a lot of ways people try to justify why they cheat.  Right now LeAnn isn’t even trying to say she’s sorry.  In fact, they aren’t trying to hide what they are doing.  They just jetted off to Mexico to celebrate LeAnn’s 27^th birthday.

Is It All That Worth It?

Soon, though, cracks will appear and they will be running back to their spouses trying to make things right.  Can you really ever make things right, though?  How do you forgive someone for being so selfish?  Really, that is what cheating is.  It is a selfish act where you show you have no regard for the feelings of your partner.

In my mind, cheating is unforgivable, but we often see people take back a cheating lover.  What makes people forgive the unforgivable?  Would you forgive a cheating spouse or boyfriend?

At what point do you get over their selfish act?  How can you ever get past it?  I really am stumped on this one because I cannot figure out how anyone could ever look into the eyes of a cheater and ever trust them again.  As we all know, trust is part of the foundation for a good relationship.

Hot And Messy

I will never forget those police photos of Rihanna.  They just made me sick.  To know Chris did that to her was even more sickening.  How does someone do that to another person?  Especially a person who they are supposed to love.

This whole thing has become one hot mess.  At first it seemed things were clear.  Chris beat Rihanna so it was all over.  That isn’t what happened.  Rumors started popping up that Rihanna didn’t want to press charges and that she and Chris were getting back together.  Now we start hearing that Chris is denying everything and says he can’t even remember that night and what happened.  What is the deal?

First, why would you ever- ever- forgive a man who beat the crap out of you?  Rihanna certainly has other options.  She can get a way better man than Chris Brown.  Who knows what is happening in her head and to be fair, she hasn’t officially taken him back.

Memory Trouble?

Second, how can a person forget beating the crap out of someone?  If Chris really does forget what happened then that just shows how much of a problem this man has.  Not only does he beat women, but he must have been in such a rage to forget that he clearly has something mental going on.

Overall, this is a sad situation.  Chris Brown ruined a great relationship and a pretty promising career.  Rihanna may forgive and forget, but fans probably won’t.  In addition, Rihanna really doesn’t seem the same person.  This changed her.  She’s like a broken woman.  I just hope she can pick up the pieces and move on.  Her dream man is still out there.

For any of you who have been abused, take this advice – move on.  No man that beats a woman is worth your time.  Every woman deserves better.

Dating with 8 children?

Imagine dating someone with 8 kids.  No single guy I know would jump on that opportunity, no matter what the mom looks.  Maybe Kate doesn’t want to date right now, but in the future, she probably will.  How will she find anyone that will want to take on the responsibility of 8 kids?

Another thing that really bothered me was that when they broke up, who left?  Jon did, of course.  Kate was left with the kids.  I know they say they will raise the kids together and that they will share parenting, but from what I have already seen, Jon is far more interested in dating than his kids.    This leads me to think that as this unfolds, Kate will be the one who has the kids the most and therefore, whomever she dates will have to be around the kids a lot.

Dad Partying While Mom is Raising Kids

Jon has been cheating and running around with chicks since this whole situation started while Kate has been doing what she does – being a mom.  It isn’t fair that she can’t go out and have fun.  Why does Jon get to go clubbing and spend evenings with young college co-eds while Kate has to stay at home with the kids?  Will Kate ever get her chance to find love again?  I guess the answers to these questions lie with Jon and Kate.  I know I will be watching to find out what happens.

As if single moms don’t face enough, there is also the whole baby daddy thing.  Most single moms come with a baby daddy that is still in their life on some level.  Guys don’t do well with any type of competition.  Knowing their girlfriends is still seeing a man they once loved and had children with can be too much for many guys.

Everything seems to be stacked against single moms. There are obstacles all over the place.

The whole situation just makes you wonder what guys think when they are approached by a single mom.  In our society, it is usually the mom who takes on the responsibility of the kids, so this is a valid concern.  There are a lot of single moms trying to date out there.

Are single moms finding it harder to date than other single women?  Or is it all about finding a guy who is open minded and mature enough to handle that they are dating a family?

I guess you just have to take it day-by-day and man by man.  There are real men out there who don’t care what baggage you come with, even if it is 8 kids.  Single moms owe it to themselves and their kids to find a mature guy who cares enough about her to not care that she has kids.

It all comes down to the fact that finding the right guy is hard for anyone.  A single mom may have more challenges in finding the right one, but he is out there.  So, dating with kids is not impossible.  One day Kate will find someone and if she can do it then anyone can.

Let’s look at the movie The Proposal.  It was a good movie, right?  It had great characters and a good plot.  What was that central plot?  A proposal by a woman to a man who didn’t really want to marry her and then through a series of events, sometimes very comical, that man decides he really does want to marry her.  So, he asks her to marry him and she, of course, says yes.

What does this teach us? To never propose to a man.  Wait for him to propose to you.

It seems in every movie or even on TV when a woman proposes the man immediately reacts with his macho instincts and find some reason to get out of it.   Even worse, in some cases he freaks out and completely rejects the woman, pushing her away and ending the relationship forever.  This just tells women that we have to sit around and wait for him to get off his lazy butt and ask us so we don’t lose him.

Is this why there are so many single ladies out there? Are we all sitting around, waiting on our Prince Charming to make his move?  What’s the deal?

Women are taught from a young age to act submissive and to let the man lead.  So many of us were raised believing just what those Hollywood movies have taught us that we are a bunch of amazing women hanging out waiting for guys to make the first move.

The problem is that those guys are the same ones taught that they should not let a woman hold them down.  They should cling to their freedom.  They are warned about how marriage ruins a relationship.  On top of that, they are also taught that they need to let women take the lead more and let them be more in control.  They are told that women do not like to be bossed around and that they are proactive and go after what they want.

No wonder everyone is so confused.  Look at what we’ve been taught.  We have women waiting for men to do something and then men either waiting for a man to make the first move or terrified of getting chained down to a relationship.  Everyone is afraid to move, so we are stuck.

How do we fix this? It starts with just being aware of all the crap advice out there.  Hollywood movies are fiction.  Real life just doesn’t play out like that.  Women need to learn that if they really want something then it is okay to ask for it because chances are your guy never will.  So, get down on one knee, ladies, and claim your man!